A Boy Named Corey
Winter Jam is usually one of the best days of the year, but tonight my heart is heavy and I'm feeling very conflicted. I met a young man tonight. An 11 year old autistic child named Corey. I actually landed on him during Red's set. I got pretty good front row seats an he'd snuck up there to watch. I didn't want to get him in trouble, and I really didn't mind as he wasn't a large person so I didn't ask him to move. He just stared talking to me about everything. About school, about his parents, about his illness. That's not when I got concerned. I got concerned when I touched his shoulder to take a picture and the kid jumped a mile and screamed in a type of pain that should be possible with a gentle touch. I didn't ask about it, but I was now very curious. I went for a walk around the arena, and he followed. I got a chance to get to know him, and he was kind. A very special boy. Matthew West sings this song called Grace Wins. It's about overcoming your obstacles and being given grace and how it always triumphs over pain. At that point he looked up and grabbed my arm and brought me really low towards him and said "I have to tell you some something. It's important" so I sat down and heard one of the most heart breaking things. He was being bullied for his autism. He was completely alone and lost. Don't want to get into too many details, but he's gone through more than any 11 year old should and his world was crashing on his shoulders. He started crumbling when a member of his family showed him how to cut, and he now, as a child with his whole life ahead of him, didn't want to live anymore. Now, I know some of you know me pretty well, and others not so much, but know that I know what it's like to be alone and feel that way. Never, in my years did I think I'd have to have this conversation with a kid who wasn't even in middle school yet. It's like seeing all of the wonder, innocence, and life washed out of someone who has yet to live in the first place and it crushed me. I'll be honest, I could see a younger version of me in his eyes, I could hear some of my friends in his voice, I could hear the sentiments of those I know who have taken their lives in his heart and all I wanted to do was hold him. I sat down, and I told him that I for one loved him very much. I think he's awesome. I told him that God loves him very much. I told him that the artists shirt he was wearing loved him and cares for him. I told him about two young men going through the same thing who were hanging on and encouraged him to keep going. I asked if I could pray for him. When he agreed I put my hand on his shoulder again and he still jumped a mile. I moved his sleeve and found all of his pain made tangible in self inflicted cuts and wounds on his shoulder. Some fresh enough to still be bleeding. I've never hit my knees so fast. I prayed with him for awhile and I don't actually remember much of Matthews set. His father came to get him and I made sure to tell him everything and my concern. Turns out his dad was worried too. He saw the cuts for the first time and the pain in my heart got reflected in his eyes. He only wanted the best for his boy but it's hard to watch that. He promised to get him help and to let me know what was going on. I know that you've heard it before but seriously, be the light to everyone you meet because you are somebody to someone. I don't even want to think about what would have happened if I had sent him away, or ignored him. I'm happy that I loved on him. I'm happy that he turn over his blades to me. I'm proud that he worked to see the light, but it breaks my heart to know that for everyone 1 Corey there are a million others. Im telling you, if you feel that way you mean the world to me. I'm here for you. Trust me you aren't bugging me, besides what are friends for? Be the light. Show the hope. Be a friend. Pray for Corey and his family. This process won't be easy for them. For now though, I promise to be a living breathing screaming excuse to believe in better things.
